Cut Out the Unhelpful (Trail Blaze #3)

1 Corinthians 6:12-- "All things are lawful for me," but not all things are helpful. "All things are lawful for me," but I will not be dominated by anything.

In this season as a mom of several little ones, I have come to believe that it is significant-- crucial, even-- for us to guard our hearts and minds by prayerfully cutting out things that are unnecessary and unhelpful.  When we are living with increased hormones, and the daily wonderful but nonetheless real responsibilities and stresses of life with young children (including its physical and mental demands), we are under great strain.

Our culture bears the signs of this-- the rise of postpartum depression, a grasping for "me time", an insistence by those who choose to avoid it in some way - "Oh, I could never (FILL IN THE BLANK: stay home, homeschool, have that many children, give up my career, have them that close together)" -- these things hint at the reality of the difficulty of this season.  Others see it, and we feel it.

And God Himself sees it... Isaiah 40:11 says that our Shepherd "gently leads those who are with young."  He knows that we are under great strain, and need to be handled gently when we are in this season of mothering young lambs.


In that same vein, I have learned to deal gently with myself-- giving myself grace and space to breathe and have a little spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional margin.  Like the woman to the right, we are faced with an overwhelming number of possibilities, and our culture encourages us to go-go-go-go-go.  Our lives have only so many hours, only so much physical and emotional strength to exert, only so many things we can be committed to do and do well.  So I try to carefully weed out unhelpful things that add strain and stress to my life.

Examples in my life of this are:

• Too many outside activities-- Instead of finding a place of stillness and quiet, our hearts have a tendency to churn...  to commit to a gazillion "opportunities" for our children that in actuality require a pace that is exhausting and draining for everyone... to be busy and going, virtually all the time.  Our culture (even church culture sometimes) places great value in activity and encourages us to place value in investing in OTHER people rather than our own families... to call OTHER service "ministry" but not that which happens within our own four walls... to look for satisfaction, entertainment, thrills, and distraction outside of our homes rather than in the relationships and eternal beauty of what happens inside of our homes.  For my part, I try to carefully limit how often we are out and about, and choose to spend the vast majority of our time and energy at home.  I'm an extrovert, and I enjoy being out and about... that's not it.  And our children are actually quite enjoyable to take to stores, go thrifting with, or steal away to a bookstore for an afternoon with... that's not it either.  They also are very good at athletics and fine arts so it's not that they can't be successful or that we are opposed to those activities. It is simply this: when we are outside our home, running around, we are much more likely to settle for distractedness rather than engaging in relational growth and intentional interaction... when we are going places, we are-- in our souls-- constantly disrupted, distracted, wandering.  There is a beauty and rarity in having a quieted and contented soul, and I find that being home-- truly staying home-- (at least, most of the time) feeds that quietness and gives us all time to be "at rest." This may not hold true indefinitely but for this season of having little ones, it is a beautiful thing that I can testify feeds the souls and bodies of each member of our family.  
• News-- for me, in this season, I've found that the news is an unhelpful and disconcerting intrusion into my life.  There are only rare moments where something truly necessary is shared on the news, and even then I know it will be told to me other ways.  If I hadn't had CNN on the morning of 9/11, I still would've learned about it within plenty of time.  If I didn't already know that we were under a tornado watch last week, the texts from Doug & Cate would have alerted me to it.  When I do (rarely) watch a news program now, I am appalled at the depth of darkness and depressing topics.  Abductions, sexual assaults, scandals, "entertainment" news (filled with sexual topics and divorce-type "news"), and far-off disasters fill the 30-minutes or hour.  As a mom with so many things on my mind, so many concerns in my heart to pray about, watching the news is worse than a mindless distraction-- it feeds fear, anxiety, anger, and discontentedness, and also stirs up discontentedness and judgment about other people.  For many years now, I have opted out of news 99.9% of the time, and I am more at rest because of it.  I still check yahoo! headlines for huge-mega-world-important-sized news, but aside from that, I try to exercise self-control and not take on stress, depression, and burdens that I can do nothing about when there is so very much right in front of me requiring my mental and emotional exertion.
• Shopping as a boredom-fixer or pick-me-up-- Shopping malls are designed to make us discontent with our lives.  Catalogs, online retailers, marketing e-mails, and more, all call out to us: "come, spend your money here on this cute tunic dress, this new diet book, this great kitchen gadget, this trendy piece of jewelry, this adorable pair of summer slip-ons, this bestselling novel... etc."  But there is no bottom to this money pit.  There will always be a new trend, a new book at the top of the list, a new diet everyone's "raving" about, a new "must have" item for your home.  No store or retailer wants you to keep your money in your pocket.  Shopping as a distraction from real life is not the answer to depression, discouragement, boredom, frustration, bitterness, a difficult relationship, or physical/mental/spiritual exhaustion.  At best it is a temporary fix that drains your resources.  At worst, it can land you in debt and lead your heart to believe that things will make you happy.  That things are where your treasure is.  That things are what make you valuable, pretty, or unique.  I am not perfect at this (bookstores are my weakness) but this is an unhelpful habit (just cruising the mall/glancing through the catalog/browsing amazon wishlists) that I have tried to cut out of my life.  When LLBean or Coldwater Creek send me their catalogs, unless I'm looking for a particular item that I have in mind right then, I go ahead and pitch the catalog right away.  When a retailer sends me a coupon, I flag it in my e-mail box so I can go back and find it if I need it, but I don't go to their website to begin scouring for something-anything-please-please-please to spend it on.  Shopping is not the answer to my boredom or discouragement, and admitting that and finding ways to deal with it has been a reality check for my soul, and has been a gift to our pocketbook.

These are three "unhelpful" tendencies I've tried to eliminate from my life.  Can you think of any unhelpful things you've eliminated from your life or home?  Are there things God would have you eliminate, even for a season, to feed your soul and body and give you rest?  I welcome your comments.

Book Reviews- 2012

My goodness, we're into March & I haven't yet posted a "Book Reviews" page for 2012.  So here goes.  I'm reading a ton of things at present, but I'll hold off on reviews until I actually finish them.

1. Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives - Richard Swenson - (see my posts on the book here) This book is revolutionary, and stands as a direct challenge & wake-up call for modern American life.  Certainly as followers of Christ, with the model set by God of Sabbath rest, and the model of Jesus Himself taking time in the wilderness and outside of cities to pray, rest, and have times of retreat and recharging, we should be more diligent in the pursuit of "margin" in our lives.  Swenson does a wonderful job laying out a critique of the marginless life, and spends a good portion of the book offering encouragement and ways to begin building margin into your life.  I greatly appreciated and highly recommend this wonderful book. 
2. What Did You Expect? Redeeming the Realities of Marriage - by Paul David Tripp - My ladies Bible study group has read through this book since Fall of 2011, and it has been so challenging, thought-provoking and encouraging.  Tripp continually reframes marital stressors & conflicts in spiritual terms and challenges us all to focus on being more like Christ in the way we love & submit to one another.  The marital picture he paints-- one of reconciliation, grace, and understanding our humanity in light of Christ's sacrifice for us-- is rich and wonderful; every woman in our study has been wowed and challenged by Tripp's words.  Highly recommended.
3. Walk By the Spirit In Your Homeschool Decisions - by Marilyn Howshall - This booklet is one in a series about homeschooling topics.  Because I heard so many raves about this particular installment, I purchased it late last year (you'll notice that, for a paperback booklet, it comes at a dear price).  It has truly been one of the more important homeschooling books I've read, and frankly, an encouragement to me as a believer.  Howshall offers encouraging instruction about listening for the guidance and wisdom of the Holy Spirit as we go through life in general, and homeschooling in particular.  I feel both free in my homeschool decisions, and wonderfully constrained in the way I lean in to hear the voice of God, after reading this small book.  Highly recommended for anyone, particularly for homeschoolers.
4. My Lady Ludlow - by Elizabeth Gaskell - (free on Kindle) - Having watched BBC's delightful series, "Cranford", when I saw the Kindle version of this book (one of the 3 books BBC interwove to make the movie version of Cranford) offered for free, I snatched it up and began reading.  As with other of Gaskell's works, I find her writing far superior to Jane Austen's in character development & the inclusion of real-life scenarios (like death of major characters, true disappointment in love, etc.).  This book was enjoyable and insightful (particularly for fleshing out the history of Lady Ludlow and informing some of her decisions seen in the movie).  This is an enjoyable little book that would be particularly enjoyable to fans of Austen or Gaskell.
5. Sixty Acres And A Bride - by Regina Jennings -  I picked up Regina's novel one afternoon, and finished shortly after midnight.  I literally could not put the book down until I'd finished! This excellent repackaging of the biblical story of Ruth (during the era of post-Civil War reconstruction, in Texas) includes historical information and details of life that ring true, giving rich flavor to the wonderfully spun tale.  I particularly appreciated the cross-cultural awareness of Rosa's struggles to adapt to life in a new culture.  The careful attention given to slowly unraveling Rosa's past (growing in understanding of her as the story progresses), and the way Jennings helps the readers to understand her culture of origin, made the story more earnest and compelling.  This is one of those books that left me gasping as I turned the pages, hoping for answers and resolution.  It was a great example of Christian historical fiction, and I recommend it.
6. Lord, Teach Us To Pray - by Andrew Murray - In college, I began reading Andrew Murray, at the encouragement of a godly friend, and since that time, whenever I have opportunity, I seek to learn from the writings of that godly man.  I snatched up this book for free on Kindle, and enjoyed slowly reading through it.  As our family dynamics have changed, I have sought to continually pursue God and yield to Him, even though the methods/practices may change over time.  So reading books like Murray's, about prayer, press me to continue pursuing God, continue letting Him change my perspective, and continue to know Him through prayer.  Like any Andrew Murray book, I highly recommend this book.
7. Witness (Seeds of Christianity) - by E. G. Lewis - I snagged this book for free on Kindle, knowing nothing about it except the small description. It's easily a 5-star book, and one I believe I'll want to return to again and again.  Having picked it up to read last night, I couldn't put it down until I finished this afternoon. Not only does Lewis weave in wonderful true-to-life details about Jewish culture, law, and experiences, but he paints such a rich picture of cultural differences. First- he provides such a rich "background" to understanding the cultural differences between the Jews & the Roman culture around them, and later, he gives clear contrast between the common, ruddy Jewish shepherds who were invited by angels to Jesus' birth in Bethlehem and the proud, richly-tuniced, ritually "clean" Jewish Pharisees in the temple. Though this story is not centered on Jesus, His birth, childhood, and ministry are woven into the fictional tale of the coming of age of a Bethlehem shepherdess.  This novel boasts not only rich historical detail, cultural insights, and biblical perspective, but Lewis grabs the heart of the reader with a love story with two very likable, good-willed characters. I appreciated every single bit of this novel, so much so, that after having a record of downloading nearly 400 Kindle books-- ALL FREE-- I purchased my first Kindle purchases today, books 2, 3, and 4 of this series, so I could continue reading the saga of the little shepherdess, Rivkah. Truly, moving frugal old me to hit the "buy now" button is a success indeed. :) Read this book! You won't be sorry!
8. Disciple (Seeds of Christianity, book 2) - by E.G. Lewis - The second in this series, Disciple continues telling the story of Rivkah, who we met as a Bethlehem shepherdess.  She is now a middle-aged woman, and through her family's life in Jerusalem, we meet the apostles, Stephen (the first martyr) and come to a greater understanding of what a tense situation it was for early Christians, as they sought to be faithful disciples of Christ, brothers to one another, careful recorders of what had occurred in Jesus' lifetime, and witnesses to the (understandably) hostile culture around them.  These books are great at giving a sense of not how things "had" to be, but how things could have been, for early Christ-followers.  I am learning so much about the cultures of the times, and enjoying a rich sense of the historical context, without feeling like I'm reading a series of lectures.  This series is truly excellent!
9. Apostle (Seeds of Christianity, book 3) - by E.G. Lewis - In this third book in the "Seeds of Christianity" series, 'Apostle', we continue to follow Lewis' characters, She'muel and Rivkah, as they settle into roles of servant leadership in the Antioch church.  Through their eyes and social circles, Lewis gives the reader a true-to-life description of what could have happened in local churches during the times of Paul's first and second missionary journeys.  We come to understand trade routes, intercultural marriage (i.e., Jewish-background Christian marrying Pagan-background Christian), Roman culture, the lascivious nature of free sexuality during the times, and what challenges the early church faced as it grew beyond its historical Judaical roots.  In a truly incredible way, Lewis masterfully provides rich historical context without sacrificing a highly engaging fictional narrative.  Lewis has done a wonderful job weaving in cultural details, historical facts, and biblical insight into the lives of She'muel, Rivkah, and their children.  Read this book!  Read the series!  I highly recommend it.

7 Quick Takes Friday - #29

1. Hope you had an incredibly restful Thanksgiving.  It's my favorite holiday.  Downtime with family... excellent food... no stress of gifts... no one's in too big a hurry. I just love it.  We feasted like kings, and I got to hold my one-month-old niece-- joy!
2. We're staying in America.  That's right, not heading back in January.  We'll continue to be here in Texas, able to love on family & friends in person.  If you're one of our (real-life) friends and this is the first you've heard of it, I'm sorry... we made the decision about 2-3 weeks ago, and have let it out in waves.  
3. Yes, that means lots is changing for us... looking for a job, house, couches, mattresses, sheets, dishes... wow.  We may end up shipping some of that back from Istanbul; we're working out logistics over the next few weeks.  Still, lots of changes coming our way.  I'd appreciate your prayers.
4. Black Friday-- you venturing out?  My mom & I are... I think we'll go to Joann's, and then I need to get socks for my youngest three children.  Somehow, every time we go to leave the house, none of them can find any socks.  We are, apparently, the Clampetts.
5. I'm LOVING this book Margin by Kevin Swenson.  If you haven't read my last few posts about Margin, you should.  This book has its finger on the pulse of the entire modernized world, and I think the author really has some challenging words.  
6. Weight Watchers is so awesome.  I love being able to eat real food, and even enjoy crazy-good-food holidays like Thanksgiving and still be a-ok weight-wise.  I've now lost 20 pounds, and still have about 20 more pounds to go.  
7. Whatcha thinking about this Republican field of nominees for 2012?  Here are my thoughts: 

• Perry is embarrassing, and Cain is just underwater now... between his women issues and his continued misspeaks, even if he is a good leader, he is just a rotten candidate.  I wish either of these men (or both!) would be humble enough to recognize that they are a drag on the race and resign, but no, they just keep right on.  
• Romney had a weird blip this week.  He was in a good position, to just wait it out and hope for Republicans come to the conclusion of his inevitability, but then he went and made this ad where he completely misrepresents something Obama said.  It's a flat-out lie.  I don't understand the reasoning behind this decision; he was sitting pretty and is now potentially in hot water.
• Gingrich has somehow positioned himself as a smart, potentially palatable non-Romney.  I think he and Romney are battling it out for the top.
• Paul is continuing to present the message of freedom and not being the world's bully.  People don't like that last part so much... but really, how has that approach (the "bring it on" mentality) worked for the last 12 or so years?  There's a reason why Ron Paul gets more donations from the US military servicemen than all other candidates combined.  He knows what he's talking about, in regard to both the budget & foreign-policy.
• Bachman & Huntsman have actually both appeared more presidential & commanding with foreign policy issues in recent debates.  It is possible that one of them might have a chance, but it's a slim chance.  
• Santorum's campaign confuses me.  I don't really know anyone who supports him and it makes me wonder if he's trying to run for veep?

What say you?  About the debate or any of the rest of this rambly post... I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Margin #3- Overload: When Our Threshold is Exceeded

Have you ever done one of those points-based "stress evaluations"?

Doug and I always laughed when we'd see those over the last 6 years, living overseas.  With culture stresses, job changes, moving apartments, new babies, changes in our diet/living, and the like, we always ended up scoring far, and sometimes ridiculously far, off the charts.

If you're a parent in this American culture, you likely would score high as well-- job change, relocation, pregnancy and babies, changes in sleeping habits, unemployment, change in schools, increasing dietary allergies and illnesses that lead to diet change-- these things are par for the course.

Overload is a common malady among us.

LACK OF MARGIN

In this discussion of building "margin" into our lives, a common objection might be, "People have always had to work hard and set priorities for their lives.  'There is nothing new under the sun,' like Solomon said."  But Swenson writes that contemporary stressors affect us all much more than typical "pressures of life" affected the generations prior to this one.  Some highlights: we have much more change coming much more rapidly in our lives; we have more activities to arrive at and more deadlines to meet; intact supportive family relationships have been dismantled; and long-term friendships are increasingly rare.

When the pressures of life mount up to unsustainable levels, and our support systems are arguably weaker than they have ever been, the result is often burnout.

In our interactions with other expats (overseas-dwellers), we would hear about burnout relatively often.  It's a common phenomenon among people who have pushed all their stress levels to the max, particularly when those people lack familiar "pressure valves" (i.e., a close relative living nearby to help with the kids every great once in a while) that they have previously used to relieve stress.

"Burnout: If you bend a small tree and then release it, the sapling will return to its former shape.  This is analogous to stress-- we bend and then recover.  However, if you bend the sapling until it snaps, it stays broken.  This is analogous to burnout.  Something inside breaks."

THRESHOLD AND OVERLOAD 
Swenson points out that we naturally bend to some limitations-- physical limits, for example, limit the number of tables & chairs that can fit in a given room.  While you might be able to cram in 100 piece of furniture into a room, would you really want to?  Of course not, because that would make the space unusable.  

Performance limitations often pertain to both physical limits & the unquantifiable factor of will power.  And while the human will is indeed and incredible force, there are physiological limits on us all...  Swenson points out:

"Runners keep running faster, and swimmers keep swimming faster.  But there must be an end to this, true?  We cannot run the mile in one second.  Neither will it ever be possible for anyone to run it in one minute.  There is a built-in physiological limit beyond which records will rarely be broken."

Like the graph shows, humans' "performance increases with increasing demand and increasing effort-- but only up to a point.  Once we reach our limit, fatigue sets in, followed quickly by exhaustion and collapse."

"Emotional limits are even more vague"-- while there are clearly physical limitations, it is more difficult to understand fully how much one individual person can "take", emotionally speaking.  And yet, we inherently know to deal gently with an emotionally fragile person, and we might say that they're "on the verge of collapse", or near their "breaking point".  

Mental limitations are as difficult to define as emotional, but certainly, the human brain can not store an unlimited amount of facts.  There is an amount of data, or a speed of input, that would cause our brain and/or memory to essentially shut down.  Swenson points to the high stress and frequent burnout among air-traffic controllers as evidence of mental limitations.

BUT WHAT ABOUT "I CAN DO ALL THINGS"?
In response to the (mis)use of that verse, Swenson answers,

"Does this mean that you can fly?  Can you go six months without eating?   Neither can you live a healthy life chronologically overloaded.  God did not intend this verse to represent a negation of life balance.  Even Jesus Himself did not heal every case of leprosy in Israel.  Think about it.

"It is God the Creator who made limits, and it is the same God who placed them within us for our protection.  We exceed them at our peril."

What happens when we exceed our limits?

• Anxiety- the load is too great, and nervous breakdowns begin to occur
• Hostility- people snap; they blame and/or take out frustration on the people around them
• Depression- their hostility is directed inward, and "they withdraw into a fog of gloom"
• Resentment- the overloading, demanding job/life that used to be enjoyed becomes the enemy

OVERLOAD SYNDROME

Swenson takes a long time to list out the way that activities, changes, choices, commitments, debt, decisions, expectations, fatigue, hurry, information, media, noise, people, possessions, technology, traffic, and work overload our lives and leave us weary and worn out.  Here are a few highlights from his expansion on each idea:

"We are a tired society.  Even our leisure is exhausting-- 54 percent of us admit we are more exhausted at the end of a vacation than at the beginning."

 "A single edition of the New York Times contains more information than a seventeenth-century Britisher would encounter in a lifetime."

"We have more things per person than any other nation in history.  Closets are full, storage space is used up, and cars can't fit into garages.  Having first imprisoned us with debt, possessions then take over our houses and occupy our time.  This begins to sound like an invasion.  Everything I own owns me.  Why would I want more?"

WHY DO WE DO IT?

To the question, "Why do we allow these things to continue?", the author offers these reasons:

1. lack of understanding-- the problem is relatively new, and thus we are blinded to it, "even when it has us by the throat"
2. a sense of conscientiousness-- feeling that we should "do all we can" or that we should always/only "give til it hurts"
3. follow the leader- "our economy and our society are run by the driven.  They climb to positions of power by force and then demand the same over-commitment from those under them."

Here, I think Swenson offers a helpful, discerning point for Christians:

"I am not suggesting that we should strive to have a pain-free, stress-free life.  The Christian walk will always be full of problems and work.  Many times we must be prepared to suffer willingly.  What I am suggesting, however, is that given the unbiquity of overload, we need to choose carefully where our involvement should come.  We must not allow ourselves to be hammered by distress in the many areas of life that have absolutely no transcendent importance.  It is not the will of the Father for us to be so battered by the torment of our age.  There must be a different way-- a way that reserves our strength for higher battles."

ONE PART OF THE SOLUTION
Finally, after 3 parts, I get to share *PART* of Swenson's solution to this lack of margin that affects nearly all of us:

"The problem is overload.  

"Each of us needs to seek his or her own level of involvement and not let the standard be mandated by the often exorbitant expectations of others.  Some around us who are much more involved than we are may not understand why we choose to hold back.  Others might be much less involved than we are-- we assume they don't care.  We must understand that everyone has a different tolerance for overload and a different threshold level when breakdown begins to occur.  It is important for us to set people free to seek their own level. " 

He suggests that the answer is in learning to set limits, and to respect the limits of others.  And he devotes the rest of the book to learning to allow for margin in each area of life.

So as we think about this, I think it is helpful to see this in terms of how we react to and interact with others.  Do we expect them to be involved in every church event?  Are our expectations grace-giving in this area of commitments and involvement, as we wish for others' expectations toward us to be?


What thoughts do you have? I've enjoyed reading your comments and reactions thus far in the series-- did these quotes/ideas bring any new ideas to your mind?

Donkey image: m_bartosch / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Margin #2: Progress, Relationships, & Mental Stress

As I continue reading Margin, I've enjoyed the things author Richard A. Swenson has to say about modern life and its lack of margin.  Margin is the idea of building "reserve" into your life, so that you have room for what's most important in life.  He observes:

"Progress's biggest failure has been its inability to nurture and protect right relationships. ...Margin, however, knows how to nurture relationship.  In fact, margin exists for relationship.  Progress, on the other hand, has little to say about the relational life.  Even our language gives us away.  When we talk about progress, we do not mean social, emotional and spiritual advancement.  [Rather, we mean progress in areas of] money, energy, transportation, housing, communications, technology, and education.  People, however, have relational needs that go much deeper."  

WHERE TO INVEST? 
His challenge in these chapters (chapters 3 & 4) is that God would have us use our spiritual gifts, and the "overflow of our hearts" to invest in the social, emotional, and spiritual environments of life, rather than following where progress would have us invest our efforts-- solely in the cognitive and physical environments of life.

Society looks for the answers to social problems in physical solutions and education-- give people more money, and/or set up more classes to educate people (i.e., Think of Oprah's classic response, "when we know better, we do better"-- is that really true?  Is modern society "doing better" now that we "know better"?).  In reality, while these temporary solutions may provide short-term relief, they do not solve matters of the heart.

"Discerning Christians have long known that God is not impressed with our wealth, education, or power.  Nevertheless, we have labored eagerly in those fields.  What if, instead, we were to begin measuring our progress not by our wealth but by our virtue; not by our education, but by our humility; not by our power but by our meekness?

"Graduate degress and DNPs will never usher in the kingdom-- only love can do that.  And love brings us back to [William] Wilberforce: 'Above all, measure your progress by your experience of the love of God and its exercise before men." 

 PHYSICAL vs. MENTAL STRESS
The final idea I want to share from these chapters is a contrast of physical vs. mental exertion, by E.F. Schumacher:

"The widespread substitution of mental strain for physical strain is no advantage from our point of view.  Proper physical work, even if strenuous, does not absorb a great deal of the power of attention, but mental work does; so that there is no attention left over for the spiritual things that really matter.  It is obviously much easier for a hard-working peasant to keep his mind attuned to the divine than for a strained office worker."

Interesting observation, isn't it?  It is obvious when you think about it-- I often get my best thinking done when I'm doing purely physical tasks-- folding laundry, washing dishes, mowing the lawn.  These type of tasks give mental "margin", and give me room to analyze life with sobriety and clarity.

Now, of course we all deal with stress differently, and we all can manage different levels of it.  Generally, though, I think our society pushes too hard, too fast, and too full... this book is definitely causing me to rethink some of the ways that I thoughtlessly ramble along with "progress" and technology in ways that might actually be detrimental to my family and myself.


What about you?  Do you see areas where progress has actually hurt your relationships, or increased your stress?  How do you manage this in your life?

Image: vichie81 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Margin #1: Progress, and the Modern Life

For the last few weeks, I've been reading (and greatly enjoying!) a book called Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives, by Richard A. Swenson, M.D.  If you're not familiar with the idea of "margin", here's a telling snippet from the 1st chapter:

"Progress has given us unprecedented affluence, education, technology, and entertainment.  We have comforts and conveniences other eras could only dream about.  Yet somehow, we are not flourishing under the gifts of modernity as one would expect.  ... How is it possible that the homemaker is still tired despite the help of the washing machine, clothes dryer, dishwasher, and vacuum cleaner?  If we are so prosperous, why are the therapists' offices so full?"

"Margin," he writes, "is having breath left at the top of the staircase, money left at the end of the month, and sanity left at the end of adolescence.  Marginless is being asked to carry a load five pounds heavier than you can lift."

He makes the point that some people believe that nothing's different now; "we've always had stress, it's just different stress now", they say.  His reply?

"I'm not the one who's making the fuss; I'm only writing about it.  I'm only being honest about what I see all around me.  Something's wrong.  People are tired and frazzled.  People are anxious and depressed.  People don't have time to heal anymore."

Dr. Swenson boils it down to this simple situation:

• Symptom: Pain
• Diagnosis: Overload
• Prescription: Margin
• Prognosis: Health

He prescribes building margin into our lives in order to restore sanity and build up a "reserve" in our lives, so that we can focus on and do what is most significant.


The Link Between Progress & Margin
I'm interested to read his recommendations for how to deal with stress and "marginlessness" in our lives, because he makes the point-- an interesting one-- that the decrease of margin in our lives is directly correlated to the march of progress.

"In a general sense, those cultures with the most progress are the same as those with the least margin.  Margin has been stolen away, and progress was the thief." 

One example offered is that when progress meets a tree, it makes "tables, chairs, bowls, and toothpicks."  Progress always changes, and gives us increasing amounts of things at increasingly faster speeds.  And yet, in the midst of all these efforts to make things bigger, faster, more intense, and better, human beings still exist with fixed, human limits.  There is only so much we can do in a day, only so hard we can push our physical bodies, only so much pressure our emotions can handle, etc.

From what I can tell of Dr. Swenson's recommendations just four chapters in, the goal of this book is not to encourage us to stop progress, hide in a cave, or become Amish.  I like how he closed up chapter two:

"Please understand: progress is not evil.  Similarly stress, change, complexity, speed, intensity, and overload are, for the most part, not enemies.  But we have different conditions at play than at any other time in our history and we must discern our course carefully lest we be overwhelmed by forces out of control.   

"We must have some room to breathe.  We need freedom to think and permission to heal.  Our relationships are being starved to death by velocity.  No one has the time to listen, let alone love.  Our children lay wounded on the ground, run over by our high-speed good intentions.  Is God now pro-exhaustion?  Doesn't He lead people beside the still waters anymore?  Who plundered those wide-open spaces of the past, and how can we get them back?"

Do these questions and concerns resonate with you?

Do you feel maxed out and spent?

Do you see a connection between the rise of technology/progress, and the lack of "margin"/space in your life?  Isn't it ironic that the more "in touch" we are with one another (Facebook, Twitter, texting, etc.), the less human-to-human interaction there really is?  Perhaps you've read this book, or another one on this subject?  I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Image: m_bartosch / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

2009 Books Finished List

Here's a list of the books I read in 2009, complete with my thoughts about it, and a link:

1. Ephesians- (The Apostle Paul) - after visiting Ephesus in December, it was particularly interesting for me to consider what it would have been like for a believer then, walking around in that city, mulling this new letter that had arrived from Paul, and trying to apply it to life. I particularly love how this text gives us specifics about how to live as the Body of Christ... it's challenging and convicting and instructive.
2. Abortion the Silent Holocaust - (John J. Powell) - excellent book that uses the eugenics/evaluation of "who's worthy of life?" mentality that existed during the reign of Nazi Germany to understand and analyze the current acceptance and support of abortion. A Jesuit priest who worked as a hospital chaplain and other interesting posts, Powell shares his personal experiences of life and death and intertwines them with his analysis of abortion and where it will lead for the culture that sits idly by while innocent people die in their midst. EXCELLENT book-- very sobering and in some ways, depressing-- but it is a righteous depression, I think, that he brings about in his penetrating discussion of this tragic topic. Click here to read my extended review of this book.
3. Lamentations - (Jeremiah?*) - This is not just a book that gives words to very deep grief, sorrow, and shame (as you would expect from the title), although it does accomplish this with mournful specificity. My favorite part of this book is how God is shown as sovereign and wholly wise in His dealings with men... even in the hard times. And how, even in the midst of depression and sorrow, God is the rightful resting place for our hope and faith. (*-authorship not expressly stated in the book, but authorship is traditionally attributed to the prophet Jeremiah)
4. Women Who Make the World Worse : and How Their Radical Feminist Assault Is Ruining Our Schools, Families, Military, and Sports - (Kate O'Beirne) - Good book; easy, fun read. I found her analysis of feminism to be quite helpful in exposing the basic lies, hypocrisy, and ironies of the doctrines of feminism. My favorite thing about the book is that O'Beirne is extremely well researched. She brings out skads of sources and studies and lays the truth bare, showing how so many of the claims of feminism have been completely dumped on their heads. If you're interested in debunking the basic tenets of feminism, or just want to see what wrong ideas feminism has injected into the minds of this last generation of Americans, get this book.
5. HINDS' FEET ON HIGH PLACES (DELUXE CHRISTIAN CLASSICS) - (Hannah Hurnard) - Excellent allegory of the deeper Christian life. This book came at a pivotal time for me and has challenged me and given me imagery to describe many of the things I've faced recently. It is very visual and descriptive, which normally is off-putting to me, but was very helpful for instructing about and fleshing out certain aspects of the Christian walk. Why do Christians face so much sorrow and suffering? Why does God ask us to sacrifice things that are precious to us? Why is the way so clouded and unclear at certain times? This book delves into these things in a very understandable and challenging way. I highly recommend it.
6. Faithful Women and Their Extraordinary God - (Noel Piper) - This is a very encouraging, challenging, and easy-to-read book. Piper examines the lives of five Christian women (Sarah Edwards, Lilias Trotter, Gladys Aylward, Esther Ahn Kim, and Helen Rosaveare) over the last few centuries and encourages us with their faithfulness, their foibles, and the way God showed Himself faithful to them. This relatively small book can be quickly read and I believe it will be an encouragement and challenge to all who open its pages.
7. Mark - (John Mark) - What a delight it is to read about Jesus. After a month of studying Lamentations, I needed it. :) Mark focuses in on Jesus' miracles, and shows the way that the people around Him just didn't get it. I was encouraged as I read through to note how often even the disciples did not understand what was being said, as Jesus' responses show me that He'll be patient with me too, knowing that I am but a weak vessel made of dust. I love the way that Mark just tells the stories of Jesus. My desire to know Christ more has both been met and been increased throughout this month of reading through the book of Mark.
8. A Celebration of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God's Gift of Sexual Intimacy - (Douglas Rosenau) - I decided to read this book because it was highly recommended by Mark Driscoll. While I have some misgivings (one in particular: he talks about birth control very flippantly and brushes off what are clearly significant ethical problems with hormonal birth control methods), I found this book to be very thorough, and even despite my concerns, recommend it for virtually any Christian couple. He deals very carefully with specifics and offers very basic and very advanced detailed information for couples who need guidance in the beginning of a marriage, advice about specific problem areas (he addresses a wide range of potential problems), and encouragement in the area of intimacy. I have not seen such a helpful book that so very pointedly celebrates marital sex, written from both a Christian and a clinical perspective. This book is for both the newlyweds and the long-married among us; I believe it would encourage, inform, and/or assist any and all Christian couples in this area of intimacy.
9. A Biblical Home Education: Building Your Homeschool on the Foundation of God's Word - (Ruth Beechick) - This book outlined some new-to-me ideas, and expanded on Dr. Beechick's ideas on homeschooling, which I'd already read in many other places. Much of the book was re-hashing (for me), so I can't say it was anything incredibly insightful for me as a mom already a few years into homeschooling. BUT! If I was a new homeschool mom, trying to really get a feel for what is *necessary*, what some of my basic goals ought to be and what school should "look like", I think this book would be quite helpful. She does outline how to base your curriculum on the foundation of God's Word and offers some helpful critiques of each homeschooling "philosophy" out there. I enjoyed the book, and have dogeared a few pages for follow-up from me. I would be hesitant to recommend this book to a seasoned homeschooler, but for the mom with preschoolers or in her first few years of homeschooling, this can be an excellent vision-shaping book.
10. The Hidden Face of Eve: Women in the Arab World, Second Edition - (Nawal El Saadawi) - This book, written by an Arab feminist (which is an interesting designation, to be sure), is insightful to the worldview of conservative Muslims in the Middle East. She shares from personal experience and offers anecdotal evidence as she paints a very eye-opening picture that highlights severe differences between Western and Arab worldviews. Much of her book is based on and even devotes pages to outlining basic feminist theology. Feminism is the same the world over-- belittling a woman's role in the home, equating marriage to slavery, and blaming all the world's problems (and certainly all of women's problems) on men. Nonetheless, this is an interesting book because of its unique perspective and the subject matter which is difficult to hear about firsthand. I found myself often having to try to cut through the hype of individual stories (that seemed designed an chosen in order to shock and incite anger, rather than to inform) to get the basic themes of the Arab mindset. Nonetheless, I found this to be a helpful book for understanding the general roles and acceptable activities and characteristics of the average Arab woman, particularly those that are in Muslim-ruled nations. (*NOTE: This book was not on my 40-book list. I'm a rebel like that.)
11. Esther - (Unknown authorship) - It was interesting to re-read this book at roughly the same time as the previous book... it gave me new insights to consider in greater depth the cultures (Persian/Babylonian) that contributed to the worldview of the modern Arab. I love the way God's fingerprints in moving people, shaping events, and causing His ultimate will to occur are so very obvious in this book. This book gives us the final historical picture of the world prior to Christ's return that we'll find in the Bible. God is still active and moving among His people, and yet they are in captivity, not able to identify openly with their God, and inwardly crying out for their Messiah. It's incredible to consider how God continually, throughout history-- and still today-- uses the lowly and the humble to bring about His purposes in the world. Esther offers us a picture of a beautiful woman, inside and out, who, while strong and resilient, affects the world around her by submitting to the authorities God brought into her life, staying steadfastly devoted to her Lord through prayer and fasting, and by listening more to even the quiet voices of the faithful people God has placed in her life rather than the noisy and imposing culture around her.
12. The Fruit of Her Hands: Respect and the Christian Woman - (Nancy Wilson) - This small booklet (at less than 100 pages of actual text, it's an easy read) is packed with challenging words and food for thought for Christian women, married & single alike. She accurately pinpoints what the perspective of the "modern" American women is on topics such as femininity, submission to one's own husband, motherhood, and marriage. Wilson honestly and poignantly shows the wisdom of Scripture that tells older woman to be in a position of mentoring towards younger women. She lays out why women should be students of the Word and understand theology. Naturally, she discusses the importance of respect (as the title suggests) in the marriage relationship, but a convicting area for me was her treatment of the topic of discretion and courtesy when discussing personal things. [Sidethought: I do wonder how this topic might be balanced a bit if we could peek in on the relationships of women in extended generational families, with their midwifery skills, menstruation tents, and communal interdependency, as was more common in biblical times. It seems a stretch to me that biblical texts saying that we should not run from house to house (which imply gossip and futile busy-ness to me) can then be taken to mean that we should not discuss intimate or private things among close women friends. But this is a side issue for me, just one I'm thinking through.] Her treatment of sexual intimacy in marriage was refreshing; it is rare (for me) to find a woman who is both biblical in her treatment of the marriage relationship and biblical in her treatment of sex; Wilson does this well. In whole, I found the book challenging... again and again, the theme of this little work is "Know Scripture", and "Respect your husband". Good words for any wife to hear reiterated, methinks.
13. Jesus Among Other Gods: The Absolute Claims of the Christian Message - (Ravi Zacharias) - This book was a difficult read for me; I had to keep myself motivated to continue plodding through. It was helpful in a few areas, but it was not what I thought it was... namely, a primer on comparative religious philosophies. It is a methodical explanation of some of the philosophical disagreements between other faiths and Christianity, but it is not a comprehensive approach to understanding differences, nor does it offer an apologetic approach for dialoguing with or about other faiths. The most moving and inspiring portion, as well as the most convincing, was his chapter about the origins of moral behavior and why only a theistic view fully explains our innate sense of right and wrong. This seemingly-chaotic book has some helpful nuggets of truth and insight, but one must be prepared to look for the beautiful arguments and points amongst an abundance of words and lengthy treatments.
14. 1/2 of Trauma Room One: The JFK Medical Coverup Exposed - (Charles Crenshaw) - I read the half that was available for free on google reader. :) This doctor claims that the wounds he saw 45 years ago in the 1st-response treatment room of President Kennedy at Parkland Hospital after the assassination do not match what was reported/released about the wounds that killed the President. This is a very entertaining book; he highlights interesting points in the middle of what is already a very engaging and emotional story. Still, by the end of the book (at least, the portion I read) I can't tell how pivotal of a role Dr. Crenshaw actually had inside the trauma room with JFK. If you're interested in the JFK assassination, this book provides a unique perspective that is worth the reading.
16. The Innocent Man: Murder and Injustice in a Small Town - (John Grisham) - This, like every other Grisham book I've ever read (which is nearly all of them), is highly engaging and thought-provoking. When we meet Ron Williamson, the central figure of the book, he's a young man with a promising baseball career in his future. As his hopes for a baseball career spiral out of his grasp, his mental health deteriorates to the point that he ends up living with his mom, sleeping half the day, and sitting on the couch for the rest of it. When a woman that lives in his same section of town turns up murdered, Ron Williamson, though he has no real connection to the case, becomes the prime suspect. Wrongful accusation, dirty cops, mental illness, small town life, life on death row, the death penalty, and more are all topics that Grisham tackles in this first non-fiction novel. I highly enjoyed it.
17. What to Do on Thursday: A Layman's Guide to the Practical Use of the Scriptures - (Jay Adams) - The title may be unclear, but Adams aim is to help Christians to know how to wield Scripture in every day circumstances. Inside, he lays out a very practical, systematic way to really get to know the Word. This is a good, simple, easy-to-read book that will challenge and assist any believer in the everyday use of applying Scripture to real life situations.
18. The JFK Assassination Debates: Lone Gunman versus Conspiracy - (Michael L. Kurtz) - This excellently researched and well-written book gives a broad and historic overview of the two major theories of what happened on November 22, 1963. Kurtz is a genuine expert, having researched and interviewed almost every angle and personality of this story of presidential assassination for over 40 years. He is also an academic, which lends credibility and fairness to the research he presents. While he is personally a proponent of the conspiracy angle, Kurtz's chapter on the lone gunman theory is a convincing and thorough case in its own right. Common questions associated with the Kennedy assassination, such as the role of the intelligence community, and connections with Cuba, are addressed in an engaging and clear manner. This is an excellent and readable book for anyone wanting to better understand the influences and major players that may have contributed to the assassination of President John F. Kennedy; I highly recommend it.
19. Keys to the Deeper Life - (A.W. Tozer) - This challenging book, more than 50 years old, could have been written to the church today. Tozer's description of modern evangelicalism as operating almost entirely on a mental level, without continual reliance on the Spirit, is right-on, except perhaps that he gives too much credit to the church for pursuing truth. Sadly, it seems that even that mental pursuit has been abandoned in the 55 or so years since he wrote this book. Though small in number of pages, this book is rich with encouragement! I'm confident that his challenges to be filled with the Spirit, to separate from the world, and to live an integrated (heart, soul, mind, and spirit) Christian life will stir the heart of any child of God blessed enough to read the book.
20. I read the first 10 chapters (which is all I intend to read) of Russ Baker's massive book, Family of Secrets: The Bush Dynasty, the Powerful Forces that Put it in the White House, and What Their Influence Means for America - (Russ Baker) - This is a very interesting book, but I certainly would not take it all as fact. While his notes section at the back is long, there are many things he asserts without documentation that are not "common knowledge" and, therefore, should be supported with references, articles... anything. Because he doesn't, I don't know how many things are mental leaps of a conspiracy theorist and how much is fact. My husband bought it for his own interest but suggested I read the first portion to get more information about Bush's role in the CIA/Cuban goings-on of the early 60's. As an addition to my Kennedy assassination research, all the info about Bush the elder as a CIA agent in the 1950's-1960's was quite fascinating. Summing up, it's not an amazing book, but it's certainly interesting, and if you don't know much and want to get a history of the Bush family, it really is an eye-opening read.
21. The Well-Trained Mind - (Wise & Bauer) - Undoubtedly, every homeschooler will encounter references to, and followers of, this book and the method presented inside. Because I have had it on my shelf for a few years, and it looks like quiet a lengthy tome, I was not prepared for how easy of a read it is. This book is more like a short philosophy of education, with a survey of the material and books to be covered in each grade, according to Wise & Bauer. Except for roughly the first quarter of the book (the philosophy part), it is almost entirely composed of lists and suggestions, organized by subject matter and grade. I am thankful that we'd already homeschooled for a number of years by the time I read this book, so that I don't feel it necessary to follow it in order to raise thinking children. To be honest, thanks to the incredible Sonlight forums and the awesome homeschooling moms I've "met" there, I didn't encounter anything wholly new or unique in TWTM, but I'm glad to have read it, and may occasionally refer to it as we progress in our children's educations. I can see how this would be a real gem for some moms who are looking for structure and affirmation about what will be "enough" for and help their children thrive in their home school.
22. Mommy, Teach Me To Read - (Barbara Curtis) - Barbara was kind enough to send this book for my growing library of homeschool/teaching-themed books after we met through the blogosphere last year. It is certainly not a book of some educational "expert" peering down with studies and graphs and theories... this is the book of a mom who has taught many children (including her 12!) to read, and wants to help you do it easily and naturally. If you are looking for a simple book with an easy-to-follow method, this could be a good fit for you. One interesting inclusion is a small appendix with ideas for teaching lefties how to write, listing out specific hand placement and approaches for using with that unique slice of the population that is left-handed. Barbara also has much experience with special needs children, and brings that to bear in the book as well.
23. Sacred Marriage - (Gary Thomas) - This is, bar-none, the best book on marriage I've ever read. Mr. Thomas clearly lays out God's plan of sanctification, maturity, blessing, and growth through a Christian marriage. I highly recommend it to any man, woman, married or hoping to be married. Happily married couples will find further encouragement; struggling couples will find challenge and hope; future married people will be informed about God's higher purpose. It really is the most solidly biblical portrayal of marriage and intimacy and God's plans that I've yet encountered. Read it.
24. Beautiful Girlhood (Ed. by Karen Andreola) - Wow. I wish I had had this book when I was growing up (I could have, just didn't know it). I can't wait to review this book as our daughter grows, and one day (maybe around age 10-13, depending on the girl), place it in her hands and read it together as she prepares for womanhood. What a beautifully written book about what girlhood and womanhood truly ought to be.
25. Genesis - I read through the book of Genesis in August preparation for our family vacation to Egypt. Some things I noticed in this read-through(focused more closely on Egypt this time) was that in the very first mention of Egypt (with Abraham-- chap 12), there is already a Pharoah and Egypt is a thriving nation. Sarah becomes a part of his harem for a while because of Abraham's half-truth (12:19). Hagar was given as a slave from Pharoah (12:16) to Abram... and when her son is born and grows into manhood, she procures an Egyptian wife for him (21:21). When Joseph is promoted as 2nd only to the Pharoah (41:38-21), he's given a wife that's the daughter of a high priest from Heliopolis (still a suburb of Cairo--41:45). Joseph settled his family in some of the best parts (45:18-20, 47:11) of Egypt (which was quite a gift, since Gen 13:10 calls Egypt a very beautiful land). Still, Israelites were already hated by Egyptians (despite Joseph's high rank)-- Joseph's Egyptian servants refused to sit with Joseph or his brothers (43:32). Joseph was given unusual latitude in the gifts/privileges given by Pharoah in exchange for his wise plan that ended with all Egyptians being owned, in body, land, and material goods by the Pharoah (47:20-21). Both Jacob (49:33-50:3) and Joseph (50:26) benefitted from Egyptian techniques of mummification. Interestingly, in the translation I brought with me (NLT), Egypt is literally the last word in Genesis.
26. Home Making (now printed with a new title: "The Family") - (J.R. Miller) - I really enjoyed how Miller went through the various relationships that exist in a home (Husband-Wife, Father-children, Mother, children, Brothers-Sisters, Brothers-Brothers, etc.) and sketched a biblical picture for the potential for growth, encouragement, and love in each relationship in the Christian home. This was a beautiful book, and I highly enjoyed it and recommend it.
27. What Our Mothers Never Told Us: Why Happiness Eludes the Modern Woman - (Danielle Crittenden) -VERY VERY interesting read. Nearly everything I've stumbled across as I've tried to purge my brain of feminist theology was presented and tackled in this book. Crittenden offers up clear, research-based criticisms of each leg of the proposed feminist journey through life and why it does women wrong. At the book's end, she provides an interesting proposal for how to navigate life as an informed, modern women. This should be required reading for the young women in our society.
28. Intimate Issues: 21 Questions Christian Women Ask About Sex - (Dillow & Pintus) - I'd read this before, but it's always good to be reminded of the freedom and delights that are ours by God's design in the realm of marital intimacy.
29. The Christian Home School - (Gregg Harris) -This book was written more than a decade ago, when homeschooling was still largely a statistically insignificant thing, when Joshua Harris was still unmarried and living at home, and when the Harris twins were kidlets. It was insightful and helpful for me to read what Mr. Harris & his wife were doing even then that has helped to sharpen and shape some of the most challenging and determined Christian young people of our generation. Harris' ideas about homeschooling, parenting, and life will be encouraging for Christian parents who seek to be intentional and interactive.
30. A Long Obedience in the Same Direction: Discipleship in an Instant Society - (Eugene Peterson) -Loved, loved, loved this. Gracious and truthful. Full of challenging, biblical perspective, Peterson has a way of digging deeper into Scripture and mining out precious thoughts for further meditation and conviction. I enjoyed mulling over this book over the course of the summer.
31. A Voice in the Wind - (Francine Rivers) - "Mark of the Lion" series, book 1
32. An Echo in the Darkness - (Francine Rivers) - "Mark of the Lion" series, book 2
33. As Sure as the Dawn (Francine Rivers) - "Mark of the Lion" series, book 3
34. A Sane Woman's Guide to Raising a Large Family - (Mary Ostyn) - Oh, I loved, loved, loved this book. Though we'd never previously interacted, Mary wrote me privately a few months ago and offered me a copy of her book. I was so excited to read it, and (living overseas) just received it last week, and devoured it in just a few days' time. It was such a great book, and I am so happy to be able to highly recommend it, without reservation. Mrs. Ostyn has such a beautiful way of presenting truth in a gracious and helpful way. There were many practical tips I underlined and dog-eared so that I can return to the book and put some things to use in our home, and there were so many times when I wrote in the margin (or said), "Yes!" This book will make the mother of a larger-than-average brood feel right at home, but there are so many great ideas and mothering "tools" that a one-child mom could find plenty to challenge and encourage her in this delightful book. 
35. The Unlikely Disciple: A Sinner's Semester at America's Holiest University - (Kevin Roose) - This book presents American evangelical Christians with a rare opportunity -- to see ourselves through fresh eyes. Now, not everything that happens at Liberty University reflects norms of American Christianity, and not everything that Roose notes is necessarily accurate or fully informed, but I believe he did a good job of trying to fairly evaluate a controversial place (Liberty U), started by a controversial man (Jerry Falwell), and populated by young people who are part of a controversial group in America (conservative evangelical Christians). His fresh straight-from-the-secular-cesspool perspectives on worship, doctrine, cultural practices, dating, spiritual transformations, and more are insightful and worth reading for anyone who seeks to understand the cultural divides and contrasts that exist in American politics, religion, and society. I'm glad to have read it.
36. America's Cheapest Family: Gets You Right on the Money - (Steve & Annette Economides) - This is a great book for getting tips/ideas/inspiration for spending less money, saving money, and being creative with what you have. The Economides family has raised four kiddos to adulthood, making an average of $30,000 per year. They take vacations, enjoy hobbies/sports, and dress well while saving money and living on what most people would consider a near-poverty-level income. I'm sure you could find more "technical" money advice in a Dave Ramsey/financial-focused sort of workshop/book. BUT- the Economides' book is focused on doing well as a family. They give practical tips and ideas I'd never thought of before. I got the book for fairly cheap, and certainly got my money's worth. I'm happy to recommend the book to anyone who wants to raise a family in a frugal and money-wise way.
37. Cranford - (Elizabeth Gaskell) - This was such an enjoyable read. Set in 19th century England, this book is remniscent of Jane Austen, but I personally found Gaskell's story to be more witty and less predictable. It includes deeper and more insightful character studies, and more subtly instructive moral lessons. There were so many times when I laughed out loud-- the book really is full of parts that are just that funny. I'm typically a quick fiction reader, but Gaskell forces you (in a wonderful way) to slow down and really savor each insightful sentence or vignette. I really, really enjoyed the book.
38. No Graven Image - (Elisabeth Elliot) - Wow. What a powerful book this is. Elliot pulls no punches in this, her only novel, as she presents life for a young woman trying to serve God in Ecuador. The picture painted is not black and white, not easily digestible... but very thought-provoking. The sovereignty of God, the "why"s of life, pain, suffering, guidance, confidence in His will... it's all questioned here in novel form. I greatly enjoyed and am glad to recommend this book. It's not an easy read, but it is a valuable read, and the questions it raises are certainly ones we should all ponder to be sure we're not creating a god of our own image-making but actually seeing and knowing and serving the God who is.
39. The Complete Father Brown Stories - (G.K. Chesterton) - What fun these mysteries are! Written by one of the premier Christian thinkers of the last century, these short story mysteries are witty, extremely well-written, cleverly planned, and each story is short enough to read in a 15-minute reading session before bed (perhaps my favorite part). The central character is a humble but sharp-as-a-tack priest who employs humor and keen insights to solve some of the most baffling mysteries. His method of solving crimes doesn't always lead to arrest... as he is a priest, he concerns himself more with the state of the souls of criminals he encounters, and his actions reflect his aims. I'm still working through them... it's one fat book, but I've read nearly a dozen so far and if you are a connoisseur of good quality fiction or mysteries in general, it is quite likely that you will immensely enjoy this collection.