Most Important Things?

God’s been doing a number on me lately- I think He’s asking me- “Jess, what’s your MOST important thing?”

Is it your HUSBAND? You see, my wonderful husband has had some unexplained as-of-yet medical issues recently. We were separated for 10 days while he had testing run in Hong Kong before me and the kids were able to join him. He's had about a gazillion blood tests, a spinal tap, EEG, EKG, CT scan, etc... and some pretty concerning possibilities have come up, leaving us both contemplating bigger issues than merely what's for supper.

Is it the KIDS? Over the last year, our kids have had more inconsistency than consistency, more abnormal than normal, more unpredictability than predictability. My mind gets wrapped up in how to best create a haven for them, how to create family traditions & routines so that no matter where we are, we’ll feel at home. I get caught up in thinking about discipline methods, structured and unstructured educational moments for them, developmental development, etc.

Is it ME & MY WANTS? I’ve gotten somewhat thrilled lately with being able to encourage and influence other people, right from my little apartment in Central Asia, through this thing called blogging. It’s given me an outreach, a ministry of sorts, and it’s felt good to have that. I’ve gotten referrals from women and websites all over the internet, and more and more people visit every week. It’s been pretty exciting. And then, just six days ago, something happened. I lost all my writings because of a problem over at blogger.com. All but a very few. It’s amazing how much I didn’t realize I had shifted some of my self-valuing over to what other people thought of my online musings. But now I know: I did it. (And here I am, blogging about it…how’s that for irony?) The blog is now back online, but the time without it sure did give me time to consider the importance I'd placed on it.

So, I ask myself: What is the most important thing in my life? None of these things are bad, in and of themselves. But WHAT is the most important thing? Certainly not blogging. Not even my kids, as calloused as that may seem to some. Not ultimately even my husband, as unattached as that may sound. Clearly, it ought to be my LORD. I can’t say that it is. But I am working on it.

Oh, I want to chase Him- to passionately pursue HIS ways at work in my life. To wake up in the morning in desperation to read His word. To sing new songs to Him throughout the day. To lift up needs of others to His throne as they are brought to my mind each day. Some of these I do. Some of these I don’t. But I want to do all of them. And I want to encourage you- whatever it is in your life that has quietly slipped in… big or small, truly concerning or somewhat menial… let HIM be your most important thing in life. Let HIM thrill you. As for me, I’ll be working on seeking HIM right alongside you.

2 comments:

theups said...

Very well said. And very convicting. Thank you for sharing what the Lord is teaching you. I so need to hear this message.

His,
Mrs. U

Praying for your husband!!!!

EmmyJMommy said...

I am one of many, I am sure, that do not know you and your family personall and found you through another blog, but I am a faithful reader who learns much and is convicted of the shortcomings in my life through your revealing heart writings. God is using you and I praise Him for that...please continue to pursue Him first, and keep posting your struggles and successes. I will continue to pray for you, especially on you pursuing God first above all in your life.